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Lovingyou.com > Pillow Talk > Sexually Speaking > Is it me? PLEASE PLEASE HEEEEELLLLP!
posted: 06/20/12 at 9:13 PM

banarabbyt1  [more]
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I agree, in the year plus you have been together he hasn't really been able to have sex to completion?

Is there anything he can do that can give him a few extra hours of sleep here? It sounds like his health is really suffering, you are stay-at-home? He's got a business? Can you help out by doing small things and take that off his hands so he has a few more hours a day? Is he the type to want to do everything? Maybe it's time he lets go a bit and let others do those things, specially if you can help him.

I think the first step is trying to ease his load, increase his sleep, then he should get his health looked at. There just might be a bit of time till then where you'll have to help yourself a bit until he gets things in order.

Good luck.

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posted: 06/20/12 at 10:41 PM

SuzyBoo1988  [more]
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Yeah pusser, hes never been able to ejaculate during intercourse. He can really rarely when he lets go but, we don't use condoms so, he knows he "can't" and he can control it. That's the main reason why. With condoms he can... We didn't have sex for a week so, maybe that's why it was so quick.

I try to tell him to go to sleep early but, since he gets home at 7ish or 8ish he likes to watch tv until 12 or he feels like hes just coming home and going to sleep right away and has no time to spend with my lying on the couch watching tv. Hes a big cuddle bug and that "our time" and he doesn't like to miss even a day.

I actually take care of the whole business, i have since we started it even with the partner but, he works a hard job. He works the jobs that we get and he also works for someone else so, he drives about 300+ miles a day and hes also lifting/fixing things all day. We're also planning a wedding and paying back some money we borrowed when we moved so all of this is piling up on him. I don't know how else i can help him, i try to do all i can. I cook, i clean, i work on the business, i give him massages, and i try and make him happy and stress free at home bu that's the most i can do i wish i could do more to help him.

He said if this continues he will go to the doctors and get blood work done and all. I'm hoping this all goes away on its own because we split from out partner a week in a half ago and that's when this all started... So i think its just stress,

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Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are.

Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two.

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posted: 06/20/12 at 11:31 PM

banarabbyt1  [more]
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He really needs to go to sleep earlier, even if he gets home at 7-8, he can sleep around 9-10 and get 2 more hours, he's only hurting himself doing this, obviously just cuddling isn't enough time for him, and I'm sure you'd rather he sleep earlier so that you can have more intimate time later!

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posted: 06/21/12 at 10:52 PM
baby07  [more]
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I haven't had sex with my boyfriend for almost 2 weeks. Mainly because we never had a chance and he seems over stressed, yesterday when he wanted to, I'm on my period.

I think it has to do with his lifestyle, he should get a couple of nights some good sleep and see if that improves things, otherwise he should get checked out for it.

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posted: 06/29/12 at 4:29 AM

SuzyBoo1988  [more]
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Ok so, now I'm even more confused. I was on my period all week and on the second say of me on it, I hugged him and started kidding him in bed and he was hard as a rock and now, last night we had sex and he got hard then during sex out goes down. He gets soft. We stop I go down on him and he goes up again then we try and have sex again and it goes down again. Wtf is going on?!?!?? I'm going to go crazy

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Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are.

Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two.

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posted: 06/29/12 at 4:46 PM

Pusser  [more]
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He obviously has some issues, physical and/or mental. He should visit with a doctor to make sure there aren't any physical problems with his body that is affecting his ability to have a normal sex life. You say he normally can't come from intercourse, and that's a red flag right there. He should make sure there isn't a medical condition causing it---the doctor can help determine that.

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"My mother used to tell me, 'In this world, you must be oh so smart or oh so pleasant.' Well, for years I was smart. I recommend pleasant." Ellwood P. Dowd in HARVEY

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posted: 06/29/12 at 7:24 PM

AniKei  [more]
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Wait, wait, wait...

Yeah pusser, hes never been able to ejaculate during intercourse. He can really rarely when he lets go but, we don't use condoms so, he knows he "can't" and he can control it. That's the main reason why. With condoms he can...

From this, it sounds like...when he uses condoms, and has sex with you, he can ejaculate.

However, he doesn't use condoms with you, so he can't.

Now, this makes me wonder.

1) Are you on birth control, or does he have to pull out?
2) Why don't you use condoms if it works for him?

Many instances of a guy having trouble climaxing inside a woman have been due to the fact that there was no birth control. This can put a HUGE stress on a guy, not unless you're trying to make a baby. The pullout method is NOT effective.

If you're on birth control, and he knows it, then yeah, I would suggest he see a doctor about his health. I'd also suggest he get more sleep and de-stress.

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posted: 06/30/12 at 2:33 AM

SuzyBoo1988  [more]
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I'm not in birth control and he doesn't want me on both control and we both don't like condoms. We do use the pull out method and that is fine with us because if we get pregnant were ok with it. He can ejaculate with a condom yes, but he doesn't like to use them and neither do i. He says all of this is due to stress but if u want him to see a doctor to check his levels he will go but he swears its not me and thwarts nothing wrong with him medically he's just exhausted and stressed. I've come to trends with this. I will take things slow and let him adjust and deal with his stress and in time it will all become better. He just needs rest. He also said he will work on it a will so, we will both try to deal with this. We are engaged and love each other this is just a bump in the road. I have to stop being such a sex aholic lol

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Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are.

Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two.

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posted: 07/01/12 at 11:18 AM
cablebandit  [more]
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why arent you guys using any birth control??? you can use a vaginal contraceptive film...its like a piece of scotch tape....just pop it in and let him do the deed.

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Rich Rodriguez : It is very difficult to reason someone out of a position they did not reason themselves into.

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