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Why are Quickies not working for me? posted: 06/13/12 at 1:57 AM
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The first time I did a quicky with my boyfriend, I started to bleed after it hurt so much, I guess I wasn't that aroused. The second time, it still hurt a bit and he wasn't ejaculating. Both times were in a doggy position and I have noticed I have to bend over a lot for it not hurt.
Is there something wrong with me or are we doing it wrong? How can you make a quickie more pleasurable?
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posted: 06/13/12 at 2:16 AM
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1, Quickies are meant to be "gotta have you RIGHT now" kinds of times. If you aren't turned on instantly, then yea, it's not going to be any fun.
2. You're still new to sex- do you know how to get yourself off quickly? Because if not, then duh, you're not going to get enjoyment from quick sex.
3. It could also be a spacing mismatch in that position. Some positions will work, and some won't.
4. And if I remember correctly- have you been to the gyno since having sex? Perhaps it's time for a check-up to make sure everything's ok physically.
5. Stop sex when it hurts. It's only going to do damage to your body and to your psyche about sex.
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posted: 06/13/12 at 2:23 AM
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I agree it might just be you are new to this and it takes you more time to get turned on enough for penetration. Also, even if we call it a quickie, your gentlemen has got to take his time and not push himself without consideration.
Also, why not keep handy some lub? I think you could really benefit from it.
I agree with K_land, get that appointment. Sometimes the hymen doesn't completely break and that is why after you're very first time you will keep on bleeding when you have sex.
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posted: 06/13/12 at 2:53 AM
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| I have made dr.s appointment but it's next Monday couldn't get an earlier time, I've also noticed some tearing raised up skin down there and I'm a bit worried. I believe it has to do with a lot of friction. But am not sure if my skin will be back to normal. The first few times, I had a lot of pain . I definitly stop it and we use lube. I'm a bit afraid touching myself inside there because I'm paranoid I might do damage. *sigh
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posted: 06/13/12 at 9:32 AM
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Since you are still new to sex, there will be some pain during intercourse and if you have very rough sex or he is very big..there will be some 'tearing' pain esp when you are not fully aroused.
You can always use some lube or try different positions (eg: woman-on-top) so you can have a better control of the speed and movements.
Another way is to let him finger you first (if you allow him to) or finger yourself before penetration.(This one helps alot for me personally)
Always communicate during sex and tell him to go slow or stop if it really hurts..Anyways, the pain will soon subside.
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posted: 06/13/12 at 3:03 PM
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Lots of sex means lots of friction. It's normal to get sore. It's just a sign that you need to slow it down, use more lube, and perhaps give it a rest for a couple of days to let it heal. I bet anything that "too much sex, take a rest" is exactly what the gyno will tell you.
Quickies don't work for everyone. They don't work for me at all, because I take a long time to come and I need very specific clitoral stimulation, and you just don't get that with quickies. But if you still enjoy the passion, the closeness, the feelings sex engenders, you can still enjoy quickies even without coming.
For example, I love outdoor sex. You have to be fast and do it in weird/uncomfortable places, so I never get off, but it's so passionate and thrilling!! I'm always thinking, "Can we do it here?" LOL!  I just wait until we get home, and let him get me off then.
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Poor is the man whose pleasures depend on the permission of another
~My opinions change with new information.~
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posted: 06/14/12 at 10:04 PM
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| quickies are awesome!! It's like going to the fridge in the middle of the night and just gobbling up a few pieces of ham or lunch meat. Its not a meal but its right to the good stuff and then you are on your way until you have time for more. A quickie for the wife and I is usually 2 orgasms for her within 4 minutes and 1 for me....great fun
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