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Blowjobs and looking up... posted: 06/08/12 at 7:24 PM
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Its taken some getting used to. Having sex and fooling around with the lights dimmed but, that is how my fiance likes it. He likes to see what hes doing and what im doing. I've grown into liking it myself because it feels as if his penis gets harder this way when he has a visual and not in the dark..
With my ex, we never had sex with the lights on, besides in the shower so, i was pretty shy at first but, now i'm comfortable with everything but blow jobs. He always tells me to "look at him" while im doing it and i cant, i feel embarrassed.. How do i just get myself to look up.. Ill try and then ill look away right away and he keeps telling me to open my eyes lol. He loves me, he tells me im beautiful all the time and how much he adores me and my body which is great because if it wasn't for his comments id probably still be turning the lights off every time.
How do i get over my fears/shyness of opening my eyes and looking into his while giving him pleasure?!? I NEED to get this under control!
Also, if there a trick to getting the penis into your mouth completely? It feels so good for him when i almost get it but, i start to gag  . Hes pretty "large" hes around 8inches so, its kinda too big for my gag reflex.. Any advise? Hmm, maybe i should buy a cucumber and practice...lol..
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Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are.
Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two.
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posted: 06/08/12 at 10:00 PM
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Yeah, it can be a little nerve-wracking to be stared at, but hopefully he'll just look down occasionally, and you can look up occasionally. Guys are just visual creatures, especially when it comes to sex, and we like seeing what you're doing and hopefully see that you're enjoying it.
Don't feel the need to lock eyes permanently. Just make eye-contact occasionally for a few seconds and then eye his genitals....and look like you're loving it. If your eyes stay closed most of the time, it looks like you're afraid to look---and besides, you could become disoriented and lose your balance. Open your eyes and enjoy the view, and make eye contact with him occasionally.
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"My mother used to tell me, 'In this world, you must be oh so smart or oh so pleasant.' Well, for years I was smart. I recommend pleasant." Ellwood P. Dowd in HARVEY
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posted: 06/08/12 at 10:10 PM
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| He looks down ALOT hell move my hair away too or ask me to get a clip... Hell lift my chin up a little to lock eyes. I started keeping my eyes open when the lights are on, when they are off i close them, i find it easier to concentrate and make sure hes enjoying it. I do look up but as soon as he looks at me i look away.. I feel like a little shy school girl...lol. I like to see his expressions too but, during intercourse when im on top besides that i try not to make eye contact too much it just makes me antsy... I gotta shake it off cause he likes it.. ahh
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Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are.
Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two.
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posted: 06/09/12 at 2:29 AM
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My partner looks at me the whole time while I'm going down on him. he's very visual and loves watching, and especially when I glance up at him.
Perhaps, just start with a quick flirty glance, then look back down.... TBH constantly looking at him might be a bit weird... my bf said the sexiest part was as I raised my eyes to him, with his c*** in my mouth.
Try and look up a few times each time until you feel comfortable with it. Meet his eyes for a few moments, then look down again. Personally I can't look at him too long, it's just not comfortable.
Good luck!
Do you like watching him come?
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posted: 06/09/12 at 2:51 AM
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Yeah i'm doing the whole look up for a second then back down but, i'll do it once see his eyes and then just not do it again the whole time.. practice makes perfect right?
I do like watching him enjoy himself, i like it alot. its a bigger turn on then anything, the facial expressions.. Love love love it...
I see why he likes it too but, its just embarassing.. I'll get over it, in time. I was never a huge "blow job" type before i met him, i pretty much hated it, now i like it because i like it when he moves and lets me know hes enjoying it..
When he goes down on me, he looks up i dont like it id rather him not, but if he likes it, i'll try harder 
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Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are.
Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two.
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posted: 06/10/12 at 5:44 AM
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I've found that if I just jump in and get up the courage to do something like that, I'm always pleasantly surprised with the outcome and then, I'm less shy about doing it more. Maybe ask him to react whenever you do that for him, to show you how much he likes it? That always helps relax me, knowing that he likes what I'm doing in the moment.
There's nothing to be embarrassed about! It's between you and him, you care for each other, and you're making him feel good and doing what he likes.. what's embarrassing? There's nothing wrong about it and to him I'm sure it's just 100% sexy and nothing else, so there's no need for self-consciousness either! I know it's a different sort of mindset, and it took me a while to get comfortable with the idea/practice of it, too. But instead of being embarrassed, I sorta embraced the "this feels rather naughty!" aspect and let it turn me on and make me more confident. In time, that goes away and you can be confident all on your own, just pleasing him. When you concentrate more on his reactions, you'll find that your self-consciousness and uncomfortableness will dissipate because of how wrapped up in him you get. At least, that's what happens to me. 
Good luck! Don't be afraid to ask him to do little things for you, too, if it'll make you more comfortable in being with him. I'm sure he'll be happy to oblige 
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posted: 06/10/12 at 5:53 PM
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I can't even open my eyes during sex.
As for how to get more of him in your mouth, it just takes practice. Some people just can't get past their gag reflex. I found that the more I did it, the more easily I could deep-throat without needing to gag. Of course I still do once in a while, but I quickly pull up, re-situate myself, and keep going. If you're too shy to practice with him, try with a carrot or something similar. There's no easy way to get over the gag except to keep trying. If that doesn't work, use your hand and your mouth in unison.
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posted: 06/11/12 at 3:57 AM
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More than that, if you can't open your eyes during sex, I wonder if you should be posting in this thread when someone doing oral is a bit embarrassed being watched.
Suzy, your only issue is you think what you're doing is embarrassing. Until you accept that loving couples do this routinely and most enjoy the other watching as part of the turn-on, then you won't get over it. When you accept that that's what loving, sexual couples do without shame, it'll be an issue.
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"My mother used to tell me, 'In this world, you must be oh so smart or oh so pleasant.' Well, for years I was smart. I recommend pleasant." Ellwood P. Dowd in HARVEY
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posted: 06/12/12 at 12:56 AM
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That's strange, could have sworn I had my age in my profile when I signed up. Should be there now.
Also, I feel I should point out, just because I can't help the OP with her eye-contact question doesn't mean I can't try to help her with her other question.
Would be a little ridiculous if people weren't allowed to help multi-question threads, don't you think?
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