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Lovingyou.com > Love Advice & Tips > Ask A Male > We have something special ..
Confusion posted: 10/22/07 at 12:10 AM

loisjomm  [more]
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We are not dating but we are very close and we know we have feelings for each other. I am wondering what a guy means when he says to a girl "we have something special , just enjoy it and you are special to me". He also told not to pin things down which I understand. I also feel he is keeping things from me too but he says I am not interfering. He also said he would like to be friends at the moment does that mean things will progress?

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posted: 10/22/07 at 12:46 AM

Archer  [more]
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Many times, there are women who post here in Ask A Male that have put themselves in similar situations and find themselves asking similar questions like yours. It's normally because a man can sense her insecurity and doesn't want to hurry the progress when he knows how much a woman like yourself really wants to be attached to him. I suggest that you try this Romantic Style Quiz:
What's Your Attachment Style?

You've been trying to make more happen, but that's not what he really wants you to do.

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The world needs more role models instead of more critics.

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posted: 10/22/07 at 4:06 AM

loisjomm  [more]
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Your Attachment Style: Secure
Based upon your quiz answers, you appear to have a secure attachment style. People with secure attachments tend to feel comfortable with themselves and their relationships. Securely attached individuals tend to have happier, long-lasting relationships. You feel comfotable sharing your feelings with your partner and are able to turn to your partner for support.

This would be my first relationship if it ever happens and no I am not pushing him at all.

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posted: 10/22/07 at 8:41 PM

qhm  [more]
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quote:
"we have something special , just enjoy it and you are special to me".

It means "I like things the way they are." At least, for now.

quote:
He also said he would like to be friends at the moment does that mean things will progress?

Not necessarily. But if you want to find out, then you need to let nature take its course.

Sometimes, you just aren't feeling that kind of "connection" with a person. And you think maybe if you spend more time with him/her, you'll start to feel that "connection." It doesn't always work out that way.

Sometimes, though, you feel an immediate "connection" with him/her, but the timing isn't right. Your situation is so unstable that it wouldn't be fair to commit yourself to promises you can't keep. Or you have to many other things you need to take care of first. Or you're just plain not ready. If things were different, you'd jump on that "connection."

You're still young, so you've got plenty of time to test out the wait-and-see approach a few times. Personally, I prefer to give it a shot first before I call it quits. Sure, it means that I could get my feelings hurt, but pain eventually goes away. It's all that could've-would've-should've-been stuff that lingers on. In the long run, it's better to live without regrets than without pain.

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井の中の蛙大海を知らず。

Last edited by qhm on 10/22/07 at 10:20 PM

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posted: 10/22/07 at 9:30 PM

loisjomm  [more]
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TY for the advice I am seeing him soon and will see what happens. I am going through a bad time atm and he has been here for me.

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