A collection of love, romance and relationships resources including advice, poetry, quotes, dedications, chat, horoscopes, romantic ideas, message boards, free love postcards and much more!!
What's New Today on LYC...
Monthly Romance Calendar
Forum Quick Links:   Forum Home   |   My Home Page   |   My Inbox   |   My Calendar   |   Find Members   |   FAQ   |   Terms  
Popular Forums:   LYC Chat   |   Love Advice   |   Sexually Speaking   |   Military Spouses   |   Online Romance   |   Ask A Male   |   LDR   |   Holidays  
Lovingyou.com > Pillow Talk > Sexually Speaking > About threesome, MMF or FFM?
What kind of threesome would you do?
This poll is closed.
Both FFM as MMF, I'm female 19 15.57%
Only FFM, I'm female 12 9.84%
Only MMF, I'm female 5 4.10%
Both FFM as MMF, I'm male 30 24.59%
Only FFM, I'm male 33 27.05%
Only MMF, I'm male 4 3.28%
None 19 15.57%
Total: 122 votes 100%
  [Edit Poll (moderators only)]

posted: 09/25/07 at 3:27 PM

Flyin_Fast  [more]
IP: Logged
 Posts: 1282
 Group: Member 
 Joined: Sep 2007
 Status: OFFLINE
Make Buddy | PM User
quote:
Originally posted by aijuswanna
....
cheating

adjective
1. not faithful to a spouse or lover; "adulterous husbands and wives"; "a two-timing boyfriend" [syn: adulterous] ...


Please.... we're talking about an alternative lifestyle here. Why would you assume that vanilla definitions apply?

Cheating to me is breaking one's vows. We made our own vows... it is what we agreed to abide by. And we can change those at any time so long as be both agree to the change. So if we wanted to include swapping, or swinging or MFMs or FMFs we'd change our vows, or contract, or agreement to allow whatever we wanted to allow. It's our choice and nobody else's business. If we agree on these new vows or "rules" and remain "faithful" to those it's not cheating.

And in the "alternative" lifestyles (swinging being just one) couples do have rules, do consider breaking those rules as cheating. If one of the rules is that the couple will only play with others as a couple, then one having a secret, behind the back, sneaky affair - that would be cheating for that couple and ample grounds for divorce.

What if people change and seek a divorce? Heck that happens within a vanilla marriage all the time. Can it happen with alternative lifestyles? Sure. Is it any more likely or less likely? I don't know.

Most couples that enter into those lifestyles or occasional diversions (Mrs C05 comes to mind... what a woman), do so knowing the risks. What almost everyone I've talked to in alternate lifestyles says is that totally honest communcations is the key to making them work.

Anf frankly that is the same thing that makes vanilla relationships work too.

click to: respond to this topic

Options: Reply To Topic | Start New Topic | Edit Message | Quote Message | Report Abuse
posted: 09/25/07 at 4:17 PM

Flyin_Fast  [more]
IP: Logged
 Posts: 1282
 Group: Member 
 Joined: Sep 2007
 Status: OFFLINE
Make Buddy | PM User
quote:
Originally posted by LemonPledge
Flyin Fast, I think your opinion is questionable in this because you just want to have sex with any woman that you can even though you don't. That's a different thing than doing it w/your wife's consent.


How so is my opinion questionable? Just because I have desires which go unfulfilled? My wife and I have "rules". I obey the rules. If she were willing to amend the rules, and I agreed to those changes, I'd obey the new set of rules. Either way, I'm following our rules, I'm being faithful to those rules (and her) and only doing whatever she consents to. And likewise she'd only do what I consent to. Otherwise we'd be cheating.

quote:
With the way you lust after other women, I'd say that this is probably the worst idea in the world for someone like you.
That's only because I married the wrong woman...

But Lemon females with your attitude toward normal male sexuality really hack me off. You completely don't get it. Many men (most?) would love to have deep meaningful sex with their wives and the occasional meaningless, recreational, just-for-fun sex with other women they are attracted to. But because our wives wouldn't like that and we value not hurting our wives more than any sexual thrill we might get on the side we suppress our desires - for the sake and happiness of the woman we love. And I think most psychiatrists would tell you suppressing your desires isn't exactly always a healthy thing to do.

As one guy said about looking at playboy, etc. I'm married, I'm not dead.

And please note the type of 3 or moresome I'm most interested in... It's not an FMF, though that would be fun.

I mostly fantasize about MFM, MMFMM... more guys helping me doing my wife, the object being to maximize her pleasure and in so doing derive pleasure for myself. Next would be swapping with a couple that are our best friends. Couples with benefits? FMF is last on the list.

quote:
But considering your wife isn't into sex with you or anyone else (that we know of) you won't have to worry about the ramifications of something like this.
sigh.... too true, and damn depressing. I think I need a drink.

quote:
But I suspect that if you searched your heart, you know what a disaster something like this would be for you personally.
Yes, it could be. Getting out of bed could be a disaster too. Life is full of risks. Flying airplanes isn't risk free, but I like it so I do it. I weigh the risks versus the benefits.

quote:
It'd whet an apetite that is already pretty intense and I suspect it'd lead to dalliances outside of wedlock for you.
Not likely. I suspect it would sate that appetite.

quote:
If there are people who can truly handle it, I don't think you are amongst them.
that may be true, but I'd like to have a chance to find out. At this point the risk would be worth it, IMO.

click to: respond to this topic

Options: Reply To Topic | Start New Topic | Edit Message | Quote Message | Report Abuse
posted: 09/25/07 at 5:32 PM

aijuswanna  [more]
IP: Logged
 Posts: 602
 Group: Member 
 Joined: May 2005
 Status: OFFLINE
Make Buddy | PM User
im (not) sorry, but i completely disagree with you. those terms are not applied just to "vanilla" marriages, but all. i personally see all those other "alternative" choices as just an excuse to have your cake and eat it too. greediness. thats all. if you are not ready to focus ONLY on your wife, then you are not ready to be married. likewise for females.

I am VERY glad that my husband does not think like you.

click to: respond to this topic

Options: Reply To Topic | Start New Topic | Edit Message | Quote Message | Report Abuse
More On Page: « First ... « 4 5 6 (7)

 

Notice: Use this form ONLY if you are already a member! New users, register for free here!
Notice: This is our quick reply form, for all reply options such as smilies, HTML and more, click here!
Fast Reply:
Your User Name:    Want to register?
Your Password:    Forgotten your password?
Subject: (Optional)
Show Signature: include your profile signature.
 Notice: By submitting to this site, you agree to these terms of use.
Forum Options:
· Save this topic to my favorites (subscribed)!

· Email this topic to a friend!
Rate This Thread:

Back To: Lovingyou.com > Pillow Talk > Sexually Speaking > About threesome, MMF or FFM?

 

LOVINGYOU.COM SITE MAP
LOVE:  Communication | Affairs | Dating | Getting Serious | Getting Married | Break Ups | Loving Yourself | Support Groups | Dear Love
ROMANCE:  Romance 101 | Ideas | Date Nights | Recipes for Two | Romantic Travel | Craft Ideas | Holidays & Celebrations
PASSION:  Lovemaking 101 | Passion Play | Loverotica | Ask Aphrodite | Pillow Talk
INSPIRATION:  Love Poetry | Love Letters | Love Quotes | Love Stories | Dedications | Printables | Lovescopes | eCards
   Terms of Use | Privacy Policy | Contact Us | Writer's Guidelines | Suggestions

Lovingyou.com, Inc.SM All rights reserved.

Message board powered by vBulletin. Copyright ©2000, 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Limited.

SheKnows Lifestyles