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Stretch Marks... posted: 05/01/06 at 2:52 AM
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Hello!
A friend of mine recently had a child and she lost al her baby weight so quickly. She is very slim, so I was teasing her saying I bet you do not even have one stretch mark! When she lifted her shirt, under her belly button was tons of marks.
I was telling my current bf (whom I plan to marry some day and hope to have children with) about my friend. I was saying how great she looked, and just how much her body changed.
His reply was very nasty, saying that stretch marks are disgusting and that is what surgery is for. I did not know how to react but get upset. I thought that was beyond rude, and if that happend to me what would he do?
I was just wondering if anyone else had gone through something like this or if "body changes' had effects on their relationships...
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posted: 05/01/06 at 3:58 AM
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When I was 12 years old, I got stretch marks on my hips and buttocks (no I wasn't pregnant lol). When I meet my husband he never mentioned them( I was 15 when I meet him).....fast forward 10 years, I just started to put emu oil on my body and the stretch marks are a lot lighter, so I want up to my husband pulled down my pants and said look at my stretch marks, he looked and said what stretch marks and I said I have had stretch marks since I was 12 and the emu oil has lighten them up, he turned around and said yes I know you have always had stretch marks since I have known you.
The reason why I am putting this in for, is because not all guys are worried about them, hell my husband never said anything about them until I did but your boyfriend seems to worry about them and I do feel sorry for you.
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Penis envy- The supposed wish of a girl or woman to have a penis, postulated by Sigmund Freud as a cause of feelings of inferiority and psychic conflict.
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posted: 05/01/06 at 4:07 PM
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I have stretch marks even before having my baby.they were mostly on my thighs. with pregnancy i got more Now 3 months after having my baby, i have them on my breasts, hips and thighs..and my belly isnt as tone as it was, even though i lost most of the baby weight.
I personally hate them but what to do..its the price u pay for motherhood, hubby never says anything about it and keeps on telling me that i look great, even though i know im not like befoe 
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"Anyone can be normal, but it takes a strong person to be different"
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posted: 05/01/06 at 5:29 PM
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| I know personally, after having my first child, my body changed a lot! My husband doesn't seem to mind the streach marks so much (even though he says it looks like a tiger clawed the Shit out of my stomach) I feel different about ME! Thats the part that sucks, you wont feel as strong or self-confident about your body as you had before. Unless youre one of the lucky ones who doesnt get any streach marks on your stomach. Just wait untill you know for sure that this is the guy youre going to have kids with. His insencitivity hurts now but it will even more when youre emotional and pregnant. My son was 11 lbs so i really streached out! Hope that helps.
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posted: 05/01/06 at 8:04 PM
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| i agree with spoiled, my body changed so much! i dont feel like i look as good as i did, but my husband still tells me i look great. i didnt get any streach marks on my stomach but i have TONS on my butt and hips, and a few on my breasts. and no matter how hard i try, i cannot get the muscle tone back in my stomach, its kind of disappointing. my husband doesnt say anything about my streach marks except that they are well earned.
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Danielle...Proud Marine Wife...
"Distance between two hearts is not an obstacle; rather a great reminder of just how strong true love can be."
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posted: 05/03/06 at 8:04 AM
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Hi Nygirl, seems your bf is more particular with your outside beauty, anyway, that's normal with guys because they want their gfs to be presentable always. But he should also see your beauty within (the way u care for him and love him) because those are incomparable and cannot be quantified.
Well, just like you guys i have also stretch marks but my husband does not mind it. I applied so many creams but unluckily they did not work out. My hubby said that i still look great most esp when i lost pounds after i gave birth to our second child. He did not even change, i mean, i am still his "Queen". I always ask him if he is not disappointed with the changes occured on my skin (stretch marks) but he's always telling me too that they are normal and part of being a woman.
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posted: 05/03/06 at 5:33 PM
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| I'm gonna tell you that when you are pregnant and those first few months after you are so vulnerable.The insecurity is enormous.I have a guy who tells me a thousand times a day how beautiful I am yet I still cry over the extra weight and the loss of feeling pretty .I would be a wreck if I felt he was disgusted with the changes I'm going through.I was lucky to come out of my first pregnancy with very little stretch marks but it's not looking that way the second time around.
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posted: 05/07/06 at 10:18 PM
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omg if my man said something like that he would get a clip round the ear!!!!!
my body has changed alot too i have alot of celluite and flab my stretch marks have faded
my partner doesnt care! he says im still beautiful no matter what! 
im still battling the bulge as well! 16 months later!
Having a baby is a life changing thing, as well as being body changing!!
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22/F/england
Single Mummy to Joshua xXx
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posted: 05/31/06 at 4:22 AM
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| oh hell no girl friend... streach marks are your trophys... screw him... lemme tell you something... i dont care if my streach marks are purple forever... they are reminders of how precious my children are to me... and if your bf is going to talk like that about streach marks now... hahaha i'd kick him not because im mean but because if you are one of us that don't have verry streachy skin... imagion how he will talk to/about your belly or how he will look at you... and when your pregnant.. well when i was pregnant i looked for anything to ***** about... my emotions went haywire!!!
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posted: 06/09/06 at 5:36 AM
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| I got quite a few stretch marks on my abdomen when i was preggo and no amount of lotion made them go away. Now a year later im still battling the belly bulge to buy my hubby doesnt care. He has never once said anything about the extra weight or the marks. He always tell me how good I look. I loved my body before I got preggo, i was finally down to the size i wanted to be, my hair was FINALLY cooperating and I was proud of me. But then i gained weight from the pregnancy, my hair has a lot of issues again, and stretch marks. I hate it, but like i siad my hubby tells me he doesnt care. Even complained at me when I wore a one piece bathing suit instead of a bikini. He said I look great in a two piece. You need to make sure his opinion changes before you even think about kids with him. Your going to feel bad enough and you DONT need him insulting you. You should talk to him , tell him how you feel. If he doesnt change then you dont need to have kids with him. Thats rude and immature. Good luck!
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"I'm already there" - Lonestar
To those who gave all - Thanks to Monta who did just that and to Erin for showing such strength.
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posted: 06/17/06 at 9:53 AM
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| i had gotten stretch marks before i became pregnant. mostly on my thighs, butt, and hips. when i was pregnant i was lucky because i had no stretch marks...that is until i gave birth. when i came home from the hospital i examed myself in the mirror and noticed i had stretch marks under my belly button, more on my butt, and some on my breasts. they are very light, but when i become self concious, i just think, "i can either not have my wonderful son and not have these marks or i can have him and the marks." the stretch marks are just a reminder to me of how wonderful my pregnancy was and how lucky i am to have my beautiful baby boy in my life...
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posted: 06/23/06 at 2:43 PM
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| my hsband doesnt care about my stretch marks but I think if he had stretch marks, he wouldnt like it. I know he is very sensitive about losing his hair which is similar to a woman having stretch marks only more obvious unless you wear a hat. ....he really gets upset thinking about the fact that he might be bald someday...
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posted: 06/26/06 at 3:37 AM
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A woman scars in many different ways , stretch marks are one of them! After childbirth you do get them, some fortunately dont but they are changed some way or another.
The body CHANGES immensley after becoming pregnant.
I no longer look or feel like I did when I wa 25 (the year before I got pregnant)
but I know that now, I am still beautiful, now in a more womanly way.
Being pregnant now, my breast are HUGE and I know the change that awaits me.
While I hope the change wont be as severe as the first baby, I face it and accept it.
My husband loved me w/my 1st baby...fat and all.
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HELP...FEELING UGLY  posted: 06/30/06 at 8:28 PM
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| WELL I AM 19 AND I HAVE A 1 1/2 MONTH OLD AND A 1 YEAR OLD AND I HAVE STRETCH MARKS ON MY BUTT,THIGHS,CALVES.HIPS AND MOST OF THEM ARE RED AND THEY LOOK DEEP LIKE I GOT CUT OR SOMETHING. WELL MY FIANCE SAYS I'M STILL PRETTY BUT I KNOW HE DOESN'T MEAN IT CAUSE WHEN I WAS 7 MONTHS PREG. HE CHEATED ON ME AND WHEN I FOUND OUT ABOUT IT HE SAID HE JUST WASN'T "SEXUALLY ATTRACTED TO ME BECAUSE I WAS BIG AND HAD STRETCH MARKS. WE'RE STILL TOGETHER... WE'VE BEEN TOGETHER FOR 4 1/2 YEARS AND OUR FIRST SON DIED WHEN HE WAS 2 1/2 MONTHS OLD FROM SIDS SO IT WAS KINDA HARD TO LEAVE HIM, BUT NOW I STILL FEEL UGLY EVEN THOUGH I'M ACK DOWN 2 A SIZE 3 BUT THE STRETCH MARKS ARE STILL THERE AND EVERY TIME I GET NECKED I FEEL ASHAMED AND I KEEP HEARING THE ONE I LOVE TELL ME THAT AND WELL, WE'RE STILL TOGETHER BUT SO IS THE STRETCH MARKS WHAT DO I DO??? HELP
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posted: 07/06/06 at 4:11 AM
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| Chance4u, you don't need a man to tell you look beautiful nor do you need someone who is going to cheat on you because he's excuse is " I am not sexually attracted to you because you are big and have stretch marks." I only wish I could be a size two after 3 kids... I am having my third child any day now and I too have stretch marks and all the battle wounds. And you know what, my husband tells me I am beautiful and sexy everyday, even though I look like the goodyear blimp. I am still his Princess... Look I was with a man (the father of my first two children) and he cheated on me too ( apparently for 6 years of our marriage... yeah I was a fool) but when I realized that it wasn't what he thought but what I thought I started to feel better about myself.... You are beautiful and you do not need any man to tell you differently. Look, the man I am married to now feel in love with me, stretch marks and kids and all... he loves me for me.... and still sees me as sexy. Girl, look in your heart and decide if this man is right for you.... is his shallowness and unfaithfulness what you want to deal with for the rest of your life when you marry him.... You are so better than that... believe me!!!!
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