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Lovingyou.com > Love Advice & Tips > Ask A Male > Do fit, muscular guys like big girls?
Do fit, muscular guys like big girls? posted: 09/20/05 at 2:47 PM

hathor6  [more]
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I am a plus size female. Height 5'8", 200lbs and pear shape. Size 16.

I am about 20 pounds heavier than Toccara from America Top Model and Celebrity Fit Club.

She is 5'9" and 180 lbs.

http://us.tv1.yimg.com/tv.yahoo.com/images/he/photo/tv_pix/upn/america_s_next_top_model_3/toccara2.jpg

http://us.tv1.yimg.com/tv.yahoo.com/images/he/photo/tv_pix/upn/america_s_next_top_model_3_finale_party_photos/toccara_jones/model3finale2.jpg

I got a little more hips and pouchy stomach and a chubbier face that she does. Not a lot but my face is more rounded than hers. I have less boobs than her though.

There is a possibility that in two weeks I will go on a "blind date" with a guy who is really fit and muscular like Brad Pitt muscular. (I saw a photo of this guy. He hasn't seen me yet.)http://bhs.broo.k12.wv.us/homepage/HOME2005/jheaton/brad%20pitt.jpg

Okay, this guy is a little bit more muscular than Brad Pitt.

I know that men like different types of women and have different preferences. That is not really my issue that much becuase I do get men who like my shape and cat call me on the street. However, some of these men are not fit themselves. They are average guys with a little bit of pot bellies, etc.

I am just wondering if a very fit guy prefer a female with the same physical fit body like himself and would consider me chubby and unhealthy. Or does a man's body type and how he treats his own body has nothing to do with his body preference on a woman?

Yeah, I am feeling self-conscious. I sort of believe that people are only attractived people who look like themselves. For instance,beautiful people like to date beautiful people. Unattractive people like to date other unnattractive people. Fat people usually date other fat people, etc.

I just feel like me and this guy is mismatched from the start....even before the so called "blind date". I fear that just being near him is going to make me feel so FAT, since it would be obvious that I do not at all work out hardly at all.

Last edited by hathor6 on 09/20/05 at 2:55 PM

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posted: 09/20/05 at 5:31 PM

ohiogurl  [more]
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My friend from work is skinny(not muscular) and likes big girls...he finds them incredibily sexy....thats why he likes me i guess i'm trying to tell you every man is diffrent..some willl like big girls and some won't...and if he doesn't its his loss...just another big girls opinion though

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posted: 09/20/05 at 6:40 PM

sorahp  [more]
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Usually people stick to their own body types. ie, skinny muscular men opt for fit and trim attractive girls. He probably won't be pleased that you didnt send a picture and will smell your fear of rejection and see that you really aren't in his ideal of attractive. but this is all probably, well most likely. But good luck anyways.

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Act and you shall have dinner. Think and you shall be dinner.

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posted: 09/20/05 at 8:31 PM

VidaLoca  [more]
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Hi Hathor, I totally sympathize. I used to be plus size (size 16), but lost 50 lbs, and now I'm petite (size 6). I find a totally different segment of guys attracted to me now. I've done internet dating (how I met my boyfriend), and I have to say it's important to be honest and up front about something like that before you meet. Otherwise he might feel like you wasted his time. The worst story I heard was about a woman who put her 21 year old daughter's pic up instead of her own, and then the guys would show up and feel totally lied to. You're right that usually people date other people of similar attractiveness levels, and I think sorahp is right that it often applies to body type, too. But some fit guys are into big girls, so you never know until you try. Also, there's more to attraction than just physical. Self-confidence is one of the most attractive qualities in both men and women, so if you don't let him know you're big before you meet, then at least go into the meeting with your head high, a warm smile, and a friendly, confident attitude. And remember, it's just one guy. There are tons of single guys out there, even if it doesn't always seem that way. Good luck!

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Hurting you is the last thing I want to do. But it's on the list.


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Cool posted: 09/20/05 at 9:20 PM

bconway  [more]
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Basically it has nothing to do with the body type,but more of a personal choice.I am six feet tall and weigh a muscular 215.I love the bigger gals and my last three lovers hit the two hundred pound mark and they were very attractive women.If he rejects you because of your body size and does not take the time to get to really know you and who you are,then why bother with his ass?.
A lot of gym rats love full figured women and a lot of them love petite women.Like Vida stated,you gotta have self esteem and self confidence.If he rejects you,so what? Your world will not end and there will be other guys.

Yeah i saw Toccarra Jones on Celebrity Fit,she was the only reason i watched that show.I think she is Hot!!(laugh).

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new york mandingo

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posted: 09/20/05 at 11:49 PM

hathor6  [more]
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quote:
Originally posted by sorahp
Usually people stick to their own body types. ie, skinny muscular men opt for fit and trim attractive girls. He probably won't be pleased that you didnt send a picture and will smell your fear of rejection and see that you really aren't in his ideal of attractive. but this is all probably, well most likely. But good luck anyways.


He didn't ask to see my photo. Nor were we suppose to show each other photos. The friend who was going to set us up just happened to show me his photo. So it is not about him with him.

But respect your first sentence as advice.

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posted: 09/20/05 at 11:53 PM

hathor6  [more]
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quote:
Originally posted by VidaLoca
Hi Hathor, I totally sympathize. I used to be plus size (size 16), but lost 50 lbs, and now I'm petite (size 6). I find a totally different segment of guys attracted to me now. I've done internet dating (how I met my boyfriend), and I have to say it's important to be honest and up front about something like that before you meet. Otherwise he might feel like you wasted his time. The worst story I heard was about a woman who put her 21 year old daughter's pic up instead of her own, and then the guys would show up and feel totally lied to. You're right that usually people date other people of similar attractiveness levels, and I think sorahp is right that it often applies to body type, too. But some fit guys are into big girls, so you never know until you try. Also, there's more to attraction than just physical. Self-confidence is one of the most attractive qualities in both men and women, so if you don't let him know you're big before you meet, then at least go into the meeting with your head high, a warm smile, and a friendly, confident attitude. And remember, it's just one guy. There are tons of single guys out there, even if it doesn't always seem that way. Good luck!


This is not an internet dating thing. I said that it is going to be a blind date...where friends set up other friends so with blind dates exchanging photos usually do not happen. I just was showed his photo though by the person setting us up.

How do I enter the conversation, "oh, I am big." to a guy? I haven't talked to him on the phone yet, but I never discussed my weight on a first phone meeting before. I wonder, if that is appropiate conversation (or a killjoy conversation) for a first [phone] impression.

Someone explain.

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posted: 09/21/05 at 12:03 AM

hathor6  [more]
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quote:
Originally posted by bconway
Basically it has nothing to do with the body type,but more of a personal choice.I am six feet tall and weigh a muscular 215.I love the bigger gals and my last three lovers hit the two hundred pound mark and they were very attractive women.If he rejects you because of your body size and does not take the time to get to really know you and who you are,then why bother with his ass?.
A lot of gym rats love full figured women and a lot of them love petite women.Like Vida stated,you gotta have self esteem and self confidence.If he rejects you,so what? Your world will not end and there will be other guys.

Yeah i saw Toccarra Jones on Celebrity Fit,she was the only reason i watched that show.I think she is Hot!!(laugh).



Not so much rejection. I wouldn't consider him an ass for not liking me. We all have personal preferences. I would hate to be called an ass because I didn't like a guy for his physical attributes.

I just wanted to know if buff guys are too much of a health nut to even consider a big girl. Perhaps this is a regular guy vs. a buff guy view of plus size women. I was wondering if there was a difference in mindset.

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posted: 09/21/05 at 12:56 AM

OneStopShop  [more]
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Everybody knows by now that Mr. Bconway is one studly puppet. Cool, and he likes chunky sistas, cause sistas hold it all together more than whites that basically squish out all over. Sorry OP, I don't persue women who let them selves go... no excuses.

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Rappidy tappidy zap bap bitssssss... (beat of my own drum).

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posted: 09/21/05 at 1:14 AM

SassyNYLady  [more]
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quote:
Originally posted by hathor6


How do I enter the conversation, "oh, I am big." to a guy? I haven't talked to him on the phone yet, but I never discussed my weight on a first phone meeting before. I wonder, if that is appropiate conversation (or a killjoy conversation) for a first [phone] impression.

Someone explain.



I know that this is "ask a male" and all, but I wanted to put my 2 cents in on just this particular question.

How do you bring it up beforehand? You don't. It's not like he asked you for a picture, or that you have led him to believe that you are something that you are not.

You don't know whether he is going to be attracted to you or not, and you won't know it until you meet him. But, let's say that you do mention it, and he is a bconway type...his reaction could very well be negative, like "how insecure IS she?". Many guys do like bigger girls, but they also like confident girls. And, notwithstanding what has been said on here, many guys do look at the "whole package". So, IMO, the key is to just be yourself, and go into it with your best foot forward and let the chips fall where they may.

Just like with anything else that you view as negative about yourself, you don't bombard someone with that in a first phone call. I would just give him the benefit of the doubt at this point. Your friends set you up for a reason...

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No matter how this all turns out...know that there is one man who loves you unconditionally darling.....unconditionally. ~LCM

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