A collection of love, romance and relationships resources including advice, poetry, quotes, dedications, chat, horoscopes, romantic ideas, message boards, free love postcards and much more!!
What's New Today on LYC...
Monthly Romance Calendar
Forum Quick Links:   Forum Home   |   My Home Page   |   My Inbox   |   My Calendar   |   Find Members   |   FAQ   |   Terms  
Popular Forums:   LYC Chat   |   Love Advice   |   Sexually Speaking   |   Military Spouses   |   Online Romance   |   Ask A Male   |   LDR   |   Holidays  
Lovingyou.com > Relationship Support > Dating > He says just friends, but acts like a boyfriend
He says just friends, but acts like a boyfriend Question posted: 11/21/02 at 2:02 PM
  [more]
IP: Logged
 Posts: N/A
 Group: Guest 
 Joined: Not Yet
 Status:
|
Hmmm - let's make this really simple for all you readers out there. Long story short. I met this awesome and talented guy, we hit it off, he had just broken up with someone when we met, claimed that he didn't want to get involved with anyone too soon after the breakup. Yet he calls all the time, invites me over constantly, we do everything together (yes, including having sex), we are very much interested in each others careers and understand completely that both careers are very demanding, yet this whole thing is working between us. He asks questions about family, he's the same religion which is an absolute plus, and we agree on long term goals and life in general..........he's totally into me on all levels - it's the fist time that I have been the one sitting back enjoying the ride instead of me chasing the guy..........he even gets jaeous when I mention other guys - big time!! BUT here's the main kicker in the ass............when I asked him to clarify what our relationship was - I got the answer "We're just hanging out." Sorry, but when I just "hang out" with someone, it's not doing all the cozy little couple type things, having deep discussions, taking bubble baths, having great sex blah blah blah. So what is his deal?

click to: respond to this topic

Options: Reply To Topic | Start New Topic | Edit Message | Quote Message | Report Abuse
Smile posted: 11/21/02 at 4:57 PM
  [more]
IP: Logged
 Posts: N/A
 Group: Guest 
 Joined: Not Yet
 Status:
|
hmmm, can i say thing here? I'm not trying to be mean or anything but well, yeah, to him you guys are just hanging out! To you, it might feel loving, caring aka a relationship but to him, its a totally a different thing. A relationship doesnt not mean what you think--but what you both think and view it as! You said he had just broken up with someone when you guys met, claimed that he didn't want to get involved with anyone too soon after the breakup-- he stated his thoughts and what he wanted sooooo clear that you should have thought about what that more deeply before you what you have your feelings involved. I say, he is lonely for now, he wants you as a friend, a lover but not commitment. in short, the sex is great, the deep dicussion is good -- he needs times...he wants to be free ... check with his feeling --- he wants/ likes the couple things, but not as a couple!

wish you love and lucks

click to: respond to this topic

Options: Reply To Topic | Start New Topic | Edit Message | Quote Message | Report Abuse
same situaation posted: 11/21/02 at 11:13 PM
sexydiva77  [more]
IP: Logged
 Posts: 13
 Group: New Member 
 Joined: Aug 2002
 Status: OFFLINE
Make Buddy | PM User
wow we are in the same boat...all i can say is watch ur emotions....i got too wrapped up we became so close and comfty taht i think it scared him and we both had feelings.
read my post friends and lovers pushing me back and reply.

click to: respond to this topic

Options: Reply To Topic | Start New Topic | Edit Message | Quote Message | Report Abuse
posted: 11/21/02 at 11:14 PM
  [more]
IP: Logged
 Posts: N/A
 Group: Guest 
 Joined: Not Yet
 Status:
|
Well, if i gave him the benefit of the doubt, i'd have to say he thought that since you had to ask the question, he'd leave you with the answer that would keep you on your toes. He said it on purpose maybe? Otherwise i'd think the man has a lack of empathy. He can call it whatever he wants as long as he treats only you the way he does, can't he? He apparently likes you a lot more than he wants to talk about. Maybe if you let it go long enough he'll ask you to marry him...as friends, then you can go hang out after the wedding!

click to: respond to this topic

Options: Reply To Topic | Start New Topic | Edit Message | Quote Message | Report Abuse
posted: 11/22/02 at 3:55 AM
  [more]
IP: Logged
 Posts: N/A
 Group: Guest 
 Joined: Not Yet
 Status:
|
mike l..........gotta love the last part of you're reply - that's the funniest thing I have heard in a long time!! Thanks!! I agree 100% though - he has feelings, but is afraid to let them out at this point - as he should be with just coming out another relationship. I am trying my best to stay guarded and not get too wrapped up, but I do have a brain and I do think about these things - can't help it - I'm human!!

click to: respond to this topic

Options: Reply To Topic | Start New Topic | Edit Message | Quote Message | Report Abuse
posted: 11/23/02 at 9:50 AM

DevlishAngel  [more]
IP: Logged
 Posts: 106
 Group: Member 
 Joined: Nov 2002
 Status: OFFLINE
Make Buddy | PM User
Wow...I'm pretty much in the same boat...and I thought, what girl could be doing something like that....a girl in love I guess? This is what I thought...I just want to be with him, so I am. When we're together, everything is right...I just hope he'd open up his eyes and see that...SOON!

**Of course all my friends are saying he's an idiot and that I should just let him go (I'd say break up but we're not in a "boyfriend-girlfriend relationship" so you can't "break up"...), I did that for awhile...but I can't help but want to be with him...wish me luck! And good luck to you too!**

click to: respond to this topic

Options: Reply To Topic | Start New Topic | Edit Message | Quote Message | Report Abuse
posted: 11/25/02 at 5:00 AM
  [more]
IP: Logged
 Posts: N/A
 Group: Guest 
 Joined: Not Yet
 Status:
|
Wow, this is amazing. I guess we're in the same boat, goodgirl.
I met J. spring quarter of last year, which was about 7-8 months ago. He was just broken up with his gf and he was devastated because she moved out of U.S. and claimed that different religions/culturals wouldn't work.

We were good friends, but unlike your situation, he wanted us to be "boyfriend-girlfriend", but he didn't really express it because I always stopped him. He would introduce his friends that I'm his "friend", but when we're at his place, he would hug, kiss and blah blah.

Now, fall quarter started, we've grown apart. He's very popular with the girls. We're both in health professions, so most of our classes are tend to be the same. Last week, instead of sitting next to me in lecture, he decided to sit with some other girl and he made sure I saw that. I was hurt, but not jealous.

On that same day, I met someone else and he hit it off right away. The next night, J. called me and started calling me honey and talked all sweet.
Now I just want to ask him this, "If someone asked me out, is it ok if I said yes?"
And if he said no, I will say, "well...i'm not asking for your permission. I'm just letting you know"

Now back to your problem GoodGirl, I think you should ask him that question and if he said no, tell him that you guys are just friends and that you're not asking for his permission. Hopefully, you'll know how he feels.
Who wants commiment when you get everything you want in a relationship without commiment??? He's getting it all without having to give in return.
I would really want to know what he would say if you asked him that. As for me, I havent had a chance to ask him and I'm not sure if I will.

Best of luck,
~KeLLy~

click to: respond to this topic

Options: Reply To Topic | Start New Topic | Edit Message | Quote Message | Report Abuse
posted: 11/26/02 at 12:00 PM
  [more]
IP: Logged
 Posts: N/A
 Group: Guest 
 Joined: Not Yet
 Status:
|
I have a somewhat similar thing here, minus the intimate stuff. Best of lock-Panasonic 360

click to: respond to this topic

Options: Reply To Topic | Start New Topic | Edit Message | Quote Message | Report Abuse
posted: 11/26/02 at 9:52 PM

peachy123uk  [more]
IP: Logged
 Posts: 974
 Group: Member 
 Joined: Aug 2002
 Status: OFFLINE
Make Buddy | PM User
If you want more than tell him. Stop the initmate stuff. Once he knows he won't be getting all intimate with you, he might realise how he feels. But watch that he doesn't just say what you want to you for the sake of initmate acts.

Good Luck

----------
3rd feb 2003 (Our special day our first kiss).
24 Deceomber 2004 (our engagement)
I love my Mr Sexy.
18 sept 2004 to peanut (alex) my special baby, I will always miss you.
20 oct 2005 (another sad loss)
27 june 2006 (love and kisses to the ones i have lost)
peachy123uk@hotmail.com/also msn messenger if anybody needs to talk.

click to: respond to this topic

Options: Reply To Topic | Start New Topic | Edit Message | Quote Message | Report Abuse
posted: 11/28/02 at 11:38 PM

DevlishAngel  [more]
IP: Logged
 Posts: 106
 Group: Member 
 Joined: Nov 2002
 Status: OFFLINE
Make Buddy | PM User
Hmm, I wrote a poem...and didn't know which category to share it in....so I hope you don't mind that I do so here....it's somewhat appropriate for this section...it's kind of bitter though...

~Let's Play~
Let's play
Together we'll take my pain away
With a soft touch here
And a gentle kiss there
We'll hold onto each other tight
And cuddle all through the night
So let's play
No worries or dismays

Let's play
I'm feeling kind of sad today
Come over and we'll have a drink
Tonight I don't want to think
I just want to lose myself in you
So I won't remember that I'm blue
So let's play
For tonight, let's play

Let's play
I'm feeling lonely, so what do you say?
Thanks for coming out
I can always count on you no doubt
You're a great pal, a real friend
You're always there for me to the end
So let's play
Smile and play

click to: respond to this topic

Options: Reply To Topic | Start New Topic | Edit Message | Quote Message | Report Abuse
More On Page: (1) 2 »

 

Notice: Use this form ONLY if you are already a member! New users, register for free here!
Notice: This is our quick reply form, for all reply options such as smilies, HTML and more, click here!
Fast Reply:
Your User Name:    Want to register?
Your Password:    Forgotten your password?
Subject: (Optional)
Show Signature: include your profile signature.
 Notice: By submitting to this site, you agree to these terms of use.
Forum Options:
· Save this topic to my favorites (subscribed)!

· Email this topic to a friend!
Rate This Thread:

Back To: Lovingyou.com > Relationship Support > Dating > He says just friends, but acts like a boyfriend

 

LOVINGYOU.COM SITE MAP
LOVE:  Communication | Affairs | Dating | Getting Serious | Getting Married | Break Ups | Loving Yourself | Support Groups | Dear Love
ROMANCE:  Romance 101 | Ideas | Date Nights | Recipes for Two | Romantic Travel | Craft Ideas | Holidays & Celebrations
PASSION:  Lovemaking 101 | Passion Play | Loverotica | Ask Aphrodite | Pillow Talk
INSPIRATION:  Love Poetry | Love Letters | Love Quotes | Love Stories | Dedications | Printables | Lovescopes | eCards
   Terms of Use | Privacy Policy | Contact Us | Writer's Guidelines | Suggestions

Lovingyou.com, Inc.SM All rights reserved.

Message board powered by vBulletin. Copyright ©2000, 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Limited.

SheKnows Lifestyles