 |
| |
|
|
|
Your worst heartbreak ever? posted: 06/29/12 at 11:40 AM
|
|
|
I first got my heart broken at 19, when I found out the first guy I ever dated was in fact...married (how ironic my life could be huh). It was excruciating painful and it took me quite a few yrs to get over it.
Then in my early 20's, I had some very bad break ups, but I was always able to move on rather quickly. I could easily replace it with a new relationship, FWBs, casual dating, in the matter of a few weeks - and life after that just got right back to normal.
Nowadays, what I'm feeling is so much worse than everything above. I don't have suicidal thoughts or anything, but I lost so much will to do anything. There are many nights in a row where I couldn't catch any sleep until the sun rises (I work til 1:00 AM). I get up late, and most of the time don't even feel like doing anything, or have time for anything else before I have to get ready for work again. I used to love going to the gym with my best friend every AM before. I love to stay active & healthy and have a nice physique at the same time. But now, I can't even sleep and that effects everything...I know time will heal everything, but my goodness._
Mind sharing your lowest point or heartbreak in life, and how did you overcome it?
click to: respond to this topic
|
|
| Options: Reply To Topic | Start New Topic | Edit Message | Quote Message | Report Abuse
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
posted: 06/29/12 at 12:11 PM
|
|
|
When my latest ex and I split for the following 6 months I went down a trip to hell. I did not shower, did not clean my home, did not cook, I cried all day long, all night long, I did not recognize myself in the mirror. I looked like the life had been sucked out of me. I could not have any music around me, or hear laughter. I snapped at people at the office and at my friends and family. My brothers would come to my place and MAKE me dress and drag me to their home for the day.
It takes times but it subsides slowly. Suddenly you want to look pretty again, you want to go out, have fun, you want your life back.
I read a lot of books, one that helped me the most was 'the giant within' from Anthony Robbins. I read about moving on, getting over heartbreaks and about Buddhism. But what made a difference at some point is that I made the decision it was enough and I wanted to be happy again, and it also helped a great deal when I accepted that I was the one responsible for everything happening in my life.
Last edited by Gail65 on 06/29/12 at 2:40 PM
click to: respond to this topic
|
|
| Options: Reply To Topic | Start New Topic | Edit Message | Quote Message | Report Abuse
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
posted: 06/29/12 at 5:19 PM
|
|
|
My worst break up was when I was 26.
Dated a man for only 9 months, but the relationship was intense. (In a good way)
He up and left one day and never said goodbye. Which made it more difficult to have any closure.
Like everyone else, I didn't do much except cry. Didn't eat, didn't sleep and could barely get out of bed. I lost interest in everything.
We did run into each other a few months later. Tried to rekindle, but it didn't work. So, the cycle of healing began once again.
I grew tired of hearing "it takes time"
It took an entire year to move on. Sad, I know.
Looking back, I realize how much was lost during that year and vowed never to lose that much time over a break up again.
----------
~Love is a cycle. When you love, you get hurt. When you get hurt, you hate.
When you hate, you try to forget.
When you try to forget, you start missing.
When you start missing, you eventually will fall in love again~
click to: respond to this topic
|
|
| Options: Reply To Topic | Start New Topic | Edit Message | Quote Message | Report Abuse
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
posted: 06/29/12 at 5:22 PM
|
|
|
Most of my breakups have been fairly mutual---it was obvious to both of us there was no future.
But in graduate school I lured this undergraduate pharmacy student away from her boyfriend (formerly a suite-mate of mine) during one of their rocky periods. She was sharp, funny, and sexy, and I could easily have married her. But a year or so later she went back to him. It made me angry more than anything, angry at myself for not making her love me more. It hurt a bit....but more than that, it affected my eating habits, etc. I lost some weight inexplicably, and went to the doctor, and he determined it was my slight heartbreak that simply affected my stress level and appetite. I never had even considered that.
She and her former ex went on to marry and have 3 kids, and they remain happily married to this day, 30 years later---he's a Facebook friend. She would have made me (and any other guy) a wonderful wife, and of all the girls I dated, she's the one I most regretted letting get away. But I've met many wonderful women who (when I was finally mature enough to let it happen) could made me a wonderful mate for the rest of my life. It just took some time for me to finally be ready. I wasn't quite with the pharmacy student.
----------
"My mother used to tell me, 'In this world, you must be oh so smart or oh so pleasant.' Well, for years I was smart. I recommend pleasant." Ellwood P. Dowd in HARVEY
click to: respond to this topic
|
|
| Options: Reply To Topic | Start New Topic | Edit Message | Quote Message | Report Abuse
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
posted: 06/29/12 at 10:12 PM
|
|
|
For the first time in life, I was actually thinking to seek for professional help. But I’ve noticed talking about all this tend to make it much worse for me. I used to have a very close friend, whom I shared everything with – especially about my personal, relationship problems. She listens and she gives me very clear guidance and advices about everything. A few months ago, she called me and I was actually scared to bring up anything about Mr. Married again (she knew about it when I first liked him a year ago), because I knew talking about those memories will make me feel VERY crappy afterwards. I just avoided her altogether.
I have never had to lose so much sleep or appetite, or interest in life like right now. It’s been only a few weeks and I already feel so numb inside. I woke up today, thinking to clean up my room a bit to make it look all fresh and nice again, hopefully it could uplift my spirit a bit. Then get rid of so many things that remind me of him. But now it’s already past 2 PM, and I am STILL just sitting here, wanting so bad to just crawl back into my bed because I’m feeling like there’s a ton of bricks over my head.
click to: respond to this topic
|
|
| Options: Reply To Topic | Start New Topic | Edit Message | Quote Message | Report Abuse
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
posted: 06/29/12 at 10:24 PM
|
|
|
Of all the relationship i'v had i have actually be the one to call it quit, so usually, i don't feel anything, but 4years ago i met å guy that swept me off my feet, he was tall, handsome and well to do,we were together for just 10months, it was lovey dovey for just 4months after which for no reason he started pulling away, the remaining 6months was hell for me! I became so insecure and clingy as i didn't know why he was pulling away, i later broke up with him, he was relieved!!! Can't believe that. For so many days i cried, it was like my world was coming to an end, it was tough but i moved on. Thank God i broke up from him cos i won't have met my present bf who means the world to me now....
Last month he called me after 3years, he wants us to get back together lol, couldn't stop laughing...i have peace in my heart now that he wants me back and i have been thinking of ways to punish and hurt him just like he did to me!
----------
One good turn deserves another.
click to: respond to this topic
|
|
| Options: Reply To Topic | Start New Topic | Edit Message | Quote Message | Report Abuse
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
posted: 06/29/12 at 10:26 PM
|
|
|
I just went online and check out the book Gail mentioned - "'the giant within' from Anthony Robbins. 544 pages - hopefully that will at least help me with my freakin sleeping problems lol j/k 
I bought a few books about “being the other woman” or having affairs with MM before and it didn’t do any good for me because nothing in there was new to me, or that I haven’t thought about. Then now I was going to buy some breakup books, but I realize that my situation is definitely not falling under the norm (normal relationships).
Last edited by Moonlightla on 06/29/12 at 10:41 PM
click to: respond to this topic
|
|
| Options: Reply To Topic | Start New Topic | Edit Message | Quote Message | Report Abuse
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
posted: 06/30/12 at 2:31 AM
|
|
|
Worse break up was my first relationship, 5 years, long distance, we shared a lot of things together and I was very attached to him. I was 22 at the time it ended...meaning my whole college experience I never got to date. I was always stuck on him and our future together.
Now that I look back, I wish I had the courage to end it sooner. Maybe I would have had more fun in college and dated around more. But I had to go through the motions to really get what I was doing to myself. I suffered for many years afterwards, trying to date, messing things up, still feeling hurt over it. It took me a good 3 years to really get over it, then I joined the military.
Either way I think everything happens for a reason, we werent meant to be, I am glad in retrospect I went through the experience, it has made me a better person.
----------
When I am at work, its like I am Iron Man...I feel invincible when I don the armor of success....
click to: respond to this topic
|
|
| Options: Reply To Topic | Start New Topic | Edit Message | Quote Message | Report Abuse
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
posted: 06/30/12 at 8:20 AM
|
|
|
My only real heartbreak was when I was 17 and I had fallen in love with someone who didn't want me.
I can't remember any relationships that ended in heartbreak...maybe because it's usually been me who ended the relationship. The couple of times that a guy ended it first, I was sad but not heartbroken.
click to: respond to this topic
|
|
| Options: Reply To Topic | Start New Topic | Edit Message | Quote Message | Report Abuse
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
posted: 06/30/12 at 4:01 PM
|
|
|
24....I was really into him....after a couple months he said it was just sex and he moved on to the next like nothing....stayed around hoping he would change that he'd see beyond sex...but it didn't make a difference....I cried all day night...loss of appetitie...cried in the bathroom at work, at my desk...sucky feeling...months of no contact is how i got to move on.....it still hurts to now to think i was just sex ...but the thing is now i know i can press fwd without feeling all down n out 
click to: respond to this topic
|
|
| Options: Reply To Topic | Start New Topic | Edit Message | Quote Message | Report Abuse
|
|
|
|
|
