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posted: 06/27/12 at 4:18 AM
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Suzy, that is a funny story.
I have never lied, but I did avoid it with my wife. I have a high number and didn't know how she'd handle it, but I was kind of in the same situation as Suzy...reading set questions in a group setting and mine was how many partners?...uh...so I eventually said mine and my wife was like "what the?" laughing along. She still jokes about it but is cool with it.
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posted: 06/27/12 at 5:19 AM
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I've only been with 1 and I would never lie about it. If a guy thinks that because I've only been with one partner, I'm "inexperienced", he is mistaken. My first partner was very experienced and I learned (and had fun) with him. I was just a late bloomer and it always takes me a while to warm up to someone.
Like Gail said, I've never been in a position to even answer that question. Nor, do I have much interest in asking it, frankly. That sort of stuff is probably more significant in high school or maybe even early 20's, but after a certain point, it just doesn't matter.
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posted: 06/28/12 at 4:06 PM
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Ones past has ZERO relevance to your present romance. Besides if you were sexually active for whatever reasons, your past has no or little relevance.
At my age I can't begin to count the number of men I have had sex with. But then I don't think 10 or 15 matters. Many were not anything meaningful. I was merely exploring my needs without romantic entanglements of the time.
I have never been asked this question. Yet I don't think that loosing my virginity at 18 was horrible. I cared for the boy, but I knew we weren't going to be forever.
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“I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.” - Marilyn Monroe
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posted: 06/28/12 at 4:45 PM
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| Agreed, Carla. Folks who ask "how many" have a selfish curiosity about the other person's experience. If there's going to be a question, it should be whether or not anything in that person's sexual past is cause for concern, such as STDs, etc. The number of partners is irrelevant---potential health issues are relevant.
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"My mother used to tell me, 'In this world, you must be oh so smart or oh so pleasant.' Well, for years I was smart. I recommend pleasant." Ellwood P. Dowd in HARVEY
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posted: 06/29/12 at 5:55 AM
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| Yeah, I was 15 when we started dating and he was 18. Me having 3 pañetes before him was a huge deal to him... now that I'm older its never been an issue for anyone else over been with. I don't care how many sexual partners my fiancé has had our anyone else I've been with, I was just asking a question.:-)
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Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are.
Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two.
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posted: 06/30/12 at 7:12 AM
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| Note to self.... Stop answering threads on my phone, my auto correct makes me sound like a dummy. Damn swype texting
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Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are.
Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two.
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