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Lovingyou.com > Love Advice & Tips > Ask A Male > What does it mean when a guy tells you....
What does it mean when a guy tells you.... posted: 05/07/06 at 6:47 AM

meadowrose  [more]
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Seeking a males opinion.

Several weeks ago, I met a guy on a dating web site who lives 2 hours away from me. For several weeks, we exchanged emails to each other every day or every other day.

In one of his emails, he told me that if I am ever visiting the city where he lives, he'd be a tour guide. Well, it just so happened that I was scheduled to be at a two day seminar in the city where he lives.

So, this guy and I made plans to finally meet face to face.

We did meet, we had such a great time together ... we just clicked. We were together from 9:00 p.m. to 2:00 p.m. If I was going to be staying late the next day, he wanted to take me out again, but unfortunately, I had to go back home the next day.

However, the night that we met, toward the end of the evening, he kept on telling me that he wanted me to come back to his city again and that we'll do this that and the other thing. He also told me that he'd like to come to my city where I live so that we can do this that and the other thing. He said that we'll get together again real soon.

When I got home the next day, I wrote him an email telling him that I had so much fun hanging out with him and meeting him....etc.

He wrote me back and said that he had a great time too..etc...etc....and toward the end of his email he stated, "It sounds like there are a lot of cool places to visit up in your area! I'd love to visit them all. Let's keep emailing and we'll get together again sometime soon."

Now, it was only a week ago that we met face to face and during this past week, we have exchanged several emails to each other...all still in the same friendly and flirty emails.

From a males perspective...what does it mean when a guy tells a woman that "we'll get together again sometime soon?"

What does that mean? What does 'sometime soon' mean?

Opinions and advise please. lol :-)

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There are four questions of value in life... What is sacred? Of what is the spirit made? What is worth living for, and what is worth dying for? The answer to each is the same. Only love.

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posted: 05/07/06 at 1:46 PM

CCooper  [more]
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I think he is interested in you.

"Sometime soon" means just that, soon. Probably whenever he can get a day off work or think of a good enough excuse to come visit without seeming obvious. It shouldn't be too soon though becasue he doesn't want you to think he is a stalker, so he is feeling you out. Trying to see where you stand when he mentions the "I'd love to visit," awaiting your response. Kinda like looking for the green light.

Of course each guys is different and that is just my take on it.

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I hope I shall always possess firmness and virtue enough to maintain what I consider the most enviable of all titles, the character of an honest man.
--George Washington

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posted: 05/07/06 at 2:06 PM

zakme24  [more]
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I've gotta agree. He's waiting on an invitation.

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Don't impress your morals on me and I won't impress mine on you.

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posted: 05/07/06 at 2:09 PM

Dipset  [more]
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Indeed, he's not demanding a date, but hope's that its the not to distant future.

Organise this next event, and ask him when he's available. Things are looking good

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Pain, without love? Pain, I can't get enough. Pain? Like it rough...cuz I rather feel pain than nothing at all......

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posted: 05/07/06 at 8:54 PM

RomanceMan  [more]
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He's interested, but not demanding a date or pressuring you in any way. Seems like a great guy who wants to get to know you better but wants to go slow, take his time. (Seemingly a rare find these days)

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Smile posted: 05/08/06 at 2:08 AM

meadowrose  [more]
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Thanks...you guys rock! :-)

Your input and advise is so helpful. I really like this guy and don't want to do anything that could potentially be a 'turn off'. He is a nice guy and I know it. I've waited a long time for a guy like him.

I do realize that in the beginning it's a very delicate balance that one walks while dating or getting to know the other person.

I know he does seem to want to take things slow...which is fine...but it is also difficult for someone like me who has a type A personality. lol :-) So I am consciously trying to follow is lead in this...move at his pace.

I also know that there is a delicate balance with this issue of time. It can't be too soon...b/c then you'll appear too anxious...and it can't be too long of a time b/c one or both of the parties might lose interest or find someone else. Hum....

I've thought about telling him that I am looking forward to our next get together and that it would be nice to see him again. Telling him once again that I enjoyed his company the last time we met. But I didn't know if telling him that would be a turn off or come across as being too pushy. What do you guys think?

I tend to be an assertive woman and don't have a problem telling a guy how I feel or what I think but I try to be much more careful and cautious when doing that b/c ... well basically...my assertive personality hasn't always been accepted or received by some men...so I try to take a more relaxed laid back approach and try to let the guy take the lead.

But from what you guys are telling me...perhaps I should take the initiative and invite him to come and visit me where I live. Oh...should the invite be in the next few weeks lets say....end of May ... beginning of June. The beginning of June will be about a month and one week since the first time that we met. Too late?

If it's next weekend or the following weekend...that will be about 3 to 4 weeks after we first met.

See what I mean...don't want it to be too soon but not so far into the future that one loses interest or thinks that the other person is no longer interested.

Sorry guys...I just don't want to scare this guy away by being too pushy or to come across as being to clingy or needy.

Ohhhhhhhh!!!!!!!! lol :-)

That's why all of my female friends keep on telling me to let him make the move...but you guys say no...for me to invite him to visit.

I really like this guy...just don't want to mess things up! lol :-)

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There are four questions of value in life... What is sacred? Of what is the spirit made? What is worth living for, and what is worth dying for? The answer to each is the same. Only love.

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posted: 05/08/06 at 3:27 AM

CCooper  [more]
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Well don't be overly cautious because if he does fall for you, you don't want it to be for the unassertive woman that you try to be. You want him to fall in love with the woman you are. So let your personality out a bit. I say invite him for the next weekend or the following one. Suggest both weekends are good for you and ask which would work for him. That way your putting the invitation out there and letting him know your interested and at the same time he gets to have some sort of 'control' in the matter. Seems like a good compromise.

I think he just doesn't want to invite himself over.

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I hope I shall always possess firmness and virtue enough to maintain what I consider the most enviable of all titles, the character of an honest man.
--George Washington

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Smile posted: 05/08/06 at 4:53 AM

meadowrose  [more]
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CCooper thanks! I will take your suggestion. Here's my next question. He lives 2 hours away from me, you don't think he would expect to stay over night with me do you? I hope not, it's too soon for something like that. lol :-) I guess if he was planning on staying overnight, he'd have to stay at a hotel or otherwise drive back home at the end of day. We are planning on going to a winery...hum...

I think I'll just invite him to come and visit and let him make the decision as to whether or not he'll stay at a hotel or drive back home.

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There are four questions of value in life... What is sacred? Of what is the spirit made? What is worth living for, and what is worth dying for? The answer to each is the same. Only love.

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Lightbulb posted: 05/08/06 at 5:56 AM

meadowrose  [more]
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I think I have a really good idea as to 'how' I can suggest for us to get together again soon. He just celebrated his birthday on Friday, which was two days ago. He knows that my birthday is on June 13th, which is in a few weeks.

Now I will be away and out of town on Mother's Day...and will be out of town the weekend of my birthday.

I can suggest to him for us to get together to celebrate BOTH of our birthdays since our birthdays are so close in time.

I will tell him when I'll be out of town and suggest for him to let me know which weekend would be best for him then.

How does that sound guys?

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There are four questions of value in life... What is sacred? Of what is the spirit made? What is worth living for, and what is worth dying for? The answer to each is the same. Only love.

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posted: 05/08/06 at 1:34 PM

CCooper  [more]
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Very good.

Have fun!

EDIT: I don't think he will try sleeping at your place. Doesn't seem like the kind of guy. But if he does suggest it at least you'll have some insight into his personality. It will of course be your decision if he stays the night or not. But I don't think he will say anything about that.

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I hope I shall always possess firmness and virtue enough to maintain what I consider the most enviable of all titles, the character of an honest man.
--George Washington

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